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Learn To Calm Down

Recently, having to deal with my “in love” feeling all the time as documented in A Falling In Love Experience Part 5, I have found various techniques useful for calming myself down. It’s very useful to calm down when you need to reorient yourself and focus on something without being overwhelmed by your emotions. So here are my top 4 methods:

Calm Down By Deep Breathes

I’m sure we’ve all heard this one before, but it really works pretty well. Take a very deep breath and hold it there. Then, very slowly let your breath out. As your breath slowly escapes, try to pretend it is a fiery jet, like you’re a dragon breathing fire! If you put your hand underneath your nose, the air coming out should feel extremely hot.

Various studies have been done that suggests your body posture can affect your mood. I think this is kind of an extension of that. When you’re angry, or in love, or agitated, or just stressed in general and get that burning feeling in your chest area, I think your body actually is warmer there. When you are “burning”, you really, literally, are hotter!

Doing deep breathing allows you to keep that part of your body at a lower temperature, in turn affecting your mood.

Calm Down By Going Somewhere Cold

In the same vein as the idea above, if the air you are breathing in actually is a lot colder, then it would be much easier to lower the body temperature of your lung area. Plus, the cold numbs you a bit, making you feel things less in general.

I had actually first noticed this effect when I was playing online poker at home. One day, my heater was turned up really high (it was actually the same setting, but the outside temperature rose), and the temperature was something like 90 degrees. I was sitting around sweating in my underwear, and suddenly realized that I felt very tense and reactive. Every pot I lost seemed to anger me more than it usually would. Needless to say, it was not a good poker session.

However, as soon as I left my room, I started to feel better. Before long, I realized that the hot air itself is actually affecting my mood. It seems like such a surprising idea, but it makes sense that as we are creatures of the earth, environmental factors should affect how we behave.

Calm Down By Exercising

In my experience, this is the best method of calming down. When you go out and do vigorous aerobic exercise for an extended period of time, almost nothing else in the world matters. When you’re running, you don’t feel love, you don’t feel pain; in fact, you don’t feel much at all besides a strong desire to finish. If you really push yourself, for a while, everything else in the world becomes just a distant speck. Your mind focuses on only that one thing – finishing.

I’ve always found running to be extremely helpful in maintaining my discipline. Beyond just the physical discipline, it shows me that I do have the mental capacity to control my body. Additionally, it shows me that I can improve and grow, building my self confidence. This also helps build mental discipline, and generally have effects that last for the rest of your life.

Calm Down By Stepping Back

The last method for calming down is to step back and examine the world in which we live. Appreciate that you are a spiritual being who just happen to be in this reality at this particular time. Look up into the sky and look at the stars. There are billions of stars out there, probably filled with even more planets like ours, amongst one of many dimensions, in one of many realities. How big is your problem compared to that? Your problem might as well be a fight between two ants. In the grand scheme of things, whatever problem you have, it’s really not that big of a deal.

Reframing your thoughts this way allows you see the problem as a small thng, which it is. When we frame problems like that, they become small and solvable. This is actually worth doing from time to time anyway, just to focus on the important things.

Well, there you have it – my top 4 ways of calming down! Combined, they give you a good tool to maintain your emotional self control. However, remember that these are just tools! If you want to establish underlying peace, you need to tackle and solve the source of your emotional distress.

Until then, these should keep you afloat!

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7 Responses to “How To Calm Down”

  1. Alex Blackwell on November 5th, 2007 12:47 pm

    Great review of techniques. I have shared this on Stumble Upon. I will attempt to begin using what I’ve leanred in post ASAP – there is a lot of value here.

  2. Anna on November 14th, 2007 9:58 pm

    Hmm, it gets quite hot in the kitchen when making dinner. Would that explain why kids get so crazy?

  3. Warren on November 20th, 2007 12:53 pm

    Anna: I wouldn’t be surprised if that has some effect :-)

  4. Britney on February 25th, 2009 7:01 pm

    stepping back is my favorite! :)

  5. Steven on September 25th, 2009 11:10 pm

    I like the stepping back

  6. Shai on December 3rd, 2010 2:17 pm

    haha I was really angry and had to google how to calm down, this was the first link at the top of the list. haha i already feel better. :D just reading on how to calm down calmed me down. two thumbs up :)

  7. lauren on September 11th, 2011 10:04 am

    I am 13 and just had a huge argument with my friend and started beating her up because my anger was out of control and i had no way of using it or how to handle it. Luckily my mum came and stopped me but i was in big trouble. for next time i will think off these tips and stop and think, thanks alot :) x hopefully there qont be a next time x :D